Partly Facetious: The majesty of New Year


“Today is the last day of the year and I reckon tonight there would be some celebrations to welcome the New Year.”

“Hey, the Islamic New Year is not going to start tomorrow and I would urge our people not to follow the decadent Western…”

“And that to me is precisely why we are losing our educated liberals to the West. You have to let the people enjoy once in a while… you cannot…”

“Islam teaches us a way of life…”

“And enjoyment is not part of it?”

“Well, yes you enjoy your family and your friends but the right way.”

“The right way defined by the likes of you!”

“Don’t get uppity with me – after all you do live in the Islamic Republic of Pakistan. Anyway we haven’t lost all our educated liberals. We have the First Family, then the Zardari clan – I mean former President Zardari has opted to return and spend New Year’s in Pakistan and you should take that as a sign of his love for the people, then there is Imran Khan – his family is in the UK and on school holidays and yet he is in Karachi inaugurating a cancer hospital there too and…”

“Speaking of The Khan’s hospital I was glad to note that Marryum Aurengzeb (MA), our Minister of Information, has come of age.”

“Yeah, you said that yesterday too, and defined coming of age as making a successful effort to becoming more of an eye candy…”

“Sad that, women do that but not men… if I recall Parveen Rashid’s looks or style never changed…”

“Parveen?”

“Oooops, this dratted keyboard has issues with z….”

“Hmmmm, maybe you need your zzzz’s.”

“Don’t we all, but anyway when I said MA has come of age I meant she is as illogical in her sycophancy as her predecessor – saying that Mian sahib gave the Khan the plot for his first hospital was pathetic given that it was public land and given the tremendous work the Khan has done in making it a charitable institution as well as providing excellent cancer care, take The Khan on his politics and mind he does give a lot on that score, but not on the charitable work…”

“Sad, but in our politics you take people on for the bad and the good!”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2016