PARTLY FACETIOUS: I am asthmatic and I rely on ephedrine

WEB DESK: “Mian sahib, his wife and elder son Hussain Nawaz went calling on the former Prime Minister to congratulate the family on the return of Ali Gilani roughly three years after he was abducted by the Taliban.

And they bore gifts – flowers and fruit and sweets and…” “No ephedrine?” “Don’t be facetious.”

“I am not being facetious, I am asthmatic and I rely on ephedrine whenever I have an attack and I heard that Ali Gilani developed asthma during his captivity, what with him being kept in rural settings where his allergies surfaced and…” “Oh shush, you are getting to be as legally savvy as Dar sahib.”

“You mean in being able to cover my butt against a defamation law suit? Yes we are all getting savvy at that…” “Right, but going back to Mian sahib and his family’s visit I have one question.”

“I know you are trying to give the visit a political twist but it was a good gesture – I mean Gilani was a predecessor in the office Mian sahib now holds and irrespective of their opposing views on the Panama leaks the solidarity of office…”

“You are one crazy fellow!” “Why?” “OK, let me ask you one question: why did he not go to the house of the Taseers? I mean their scion was abducted for five years and…”

“If you are trying to tell me that Gilanis carry more political weight than the Taseers’, yes I agree, but at the end of the day the two families’ political fortunes are entirely dependent on one man: and he is in London where we are told a meeting is scheduled but can Mian sahib meet any of Zardari sahib’s demands is my question and the answer is no. But what was your question?” “Two things before I ask my question.

First, do not compare Gilani with Mian sahib – the former followed orders while the latter gives orders.

Secondly, while you may argue that Mayfair flats is Mian sahib’s Surrey palace…” “Mayfair flats are probably triple the price of the Surrey palace…” “There you go: the difference between waderas who go for size and an industrialist who goes for location…”

“Oh stop being facetious.” “Anyway my question is where was the heir apparent? Where was Maryam Nawaz? Why didn’t she accompany Mian sahib instead of Hussain Nawaz?” “It was a question of the brute strength – she couldn’t carry the sweets and the flowers and the…” “There is no sense talking to you when you are being this facetious!!”– Business Recorder